The Bumper-Humper!

Chatting with a friends last night, the topic turned to sex al fresco. While it's not quite the right weather for sex on a beach, it's a warming thought, now, isn't it? Conversation moved onto one of those wine-induced discussions of the most unusual place for engaging in a bit of nookie. While I raised a few eyebrows with my responses, mentioning that I never had sex in a car left them speechless. Yes, I confess, my names is Karen and I am a car virgin!

Amomaxia, or sex in parked cars, is frequently practised. UK newspaper The Sun reports that half the UK population like to sizzle in the driver's seat. It is so popular that there's even a version of the Kama Sutra on the net specifically for cars...illustrated, of course!

Perhaps it's the throttle or even the phallic shape, but for some speed isn't the only thrill to be had from all that horsepower. Years ago, an ex relayed tales of a previous girlfriend's excitement in cars - whether it was to pop my car cherry I will never know - but apparently, she loved nothing better than to pleasure herself in the passenger seat as the spedometer cruised at 100mph. Of course, in a low-lying convertible, she also had an exhibitionist buzz from lorry drivers watching her.

There's much more fun to be had from cars than merely having sex in them. On the bonnet too would be nice! Sexual activities, such as dogging or carping, require cars not only for transportation to remote spots, but as places which to exhibit and demonstrate your arousal.

However, I wouldn't really call any of this a fetish and certainly not a paraphilia - it's all a bit too vanilla and 'date at the drive-in' for that. But, I must confess that my mind wandered down its sordid path - wondering just how deep the phallic car's attraction goes.

Earlier this month, The Sun reported of mechanic Chris who gives new meaning to a man who loves cars. He claims to have had sex with more than 30 different models in 20 years, plus two motorboats and a pal’s jetski.

Chris, who lives in the West Country, explained his passion: “A nice car for me is a feast for the senses. It’s about smells, feelings and tastes. If I see a gorgeous Mercedes I know I’d love to jump into bed with it.”

The mechanic, who allows visitors to his garage to video him enjoying a muffler shuffle while pleasuring themselves, has owned a string of cars including a black 2.5litre Jaguar X-Type with cream leather upholstery.

The mechanic adds: “It’s all about imagination and creativity. There’s more to car love than exhaust pipes. Stroking the body panels and delicate touching makes excellent foreplay.”

On his website, Chris explains “auto-eroticism” and has even written a manual called "How To Make Love To A Car". Advice includes: "The tailpipe isn't the only option! If it interests you, get hold of a silicon sleeve from Clone Zone or some other tool to make life easier on your tool" and "Roleplay involving the car is another spice. Needless to say solo roleplay requires vivid imagination and the ability to suspend rational thought." So, the car pretends it's dead? Sorry...still got necrophilia haunting me from yesterday!

The mechanic isn't alone in what he calls his 'auto-eroticism'. Other manuals are available on the internet, such as Dekhyr Dragon's definitive "Guide to Sex with Cars (for males)". Dekhyr's top tip? Although, I'm a novice to all this car sex, it has to be: " Never fuck a car hot. I did, once. Once."

So, am I sold on cars and ready to pop that cherry? Erm, no... Maybe it was seeing too much Kitt in the 80's or perhaps even the BJ scene in The World According to Garp but cars, sex and me just don't mix!

Sticky Situations

While the thought of being bound up and being at the every whim and mercy of a teasing lover may send the female pulse racing, being trapped and left immobile by a precarious real-world situation leaves most women anxious and panic-stricken. Anger and worry mingle with tears as they struggle - helplessly waiting for a knight in shining armour comes to their rescue.

However, be wary of that knight riding towards you, ladies, for he may be a stuck-fetishist in disguise! For these pseudo-knights, seeing a woman (or man) immobilised by a sticky situation - whether it be glued to a chair, sinking in quicksand or bound to another person - has a tendency to leave them a sticky mess.

Private Yahoo groups like Sticky Situations allows those with an interest in both seeing people get stuck and being stuck themselves the opportunity to express their thoughts and share their interests.

Sticky Site offers specialised entertainment for members by covering variations of the stuck theme including those who prefer: cement, tight spaces, chains, captures and encasement. While the site has an active forum, it also has a great deal of links to this sticky community and showcases members' artworks in the gallery and their fiction in an archive as well.

Researching this area, I have to admit that one variety of the fetish intrigued me more than others - particularly as it's blossoming with the help of the internet. From the land of NASCAR we have a niche which combines the joys of stockings, heels and cranking with the all-man horsepower of cars....oh, and mud - lots of mud!

Sites such as Stuck World allow insight into the thrills of women in cars wheel-spinning mud and snow. Frequented mainly by men, the message boards are active with links to stuck scenes in the media, as well as 'finds' on blogs such as Ryann the Stripper's last week. Poor Ryann had a tough time getting her car up the hill in the snow last week and now she appears to have become the fixation for the Stuck World online community as well. Over the last few days, she's been inundated with messages from members about her 'stuck experience' both via her blog and via her My Space account. Yes, they even tracked her down there - to say I was concerned was an understatement!

Among the car stuck community, there is a great deal of discussion about the 'perfect' stuck as well as personal interests and needs. It would appear that the fantasy for members isn't necessarily duplicated in reality so there is a great deal of frustration.

A member, calling himself Broadsword20048 explains: "All I want is to see a nice attractive women get stuck in some mud or snow in a rear-wheel drive vehicle. She doesn't have to be wearing high heels or pumps and a skirt or anything, just be attractive and be stuck like that, but there's always something wrong, like the woman isn't that great-looking.... or she is driving a front-wheel drive vehicle, or the vehicle is stuck and rear-wheel drive but is a MAN (UGH!), I wanna see that perfect stuck!!"

Well, perhaps he should look no further than to sites like Car Stuck Girls which offers a range of dvds catering specifically to this fetish. But, I am struck by the feeling that while these dvds offer up exactly what's desired, the element of having a great 'find' and the surprise of stumbling across an arousing situation is lost.

It seems the greater and more specific the fantasy, the more disappointment there is to be found in reality - which leaves many with internet access heading for the porn sites for their 'fix'. However, as humans, we are born stubborn and determined and we won't let reality step in our way. It seems that whether we're into sticky kinky action or vanilla, we won't stop yearning for our own 'perfect stuck'.

P.S.While some may argue that this isn't necessarily a fetish or paraphilia, in my opinion it definitely falls into the category of unusual sexual interest. All of our boundaries are pushed at times - and my blog is no exception. So - what do you think? Comment and let me know!